"The Man, The Mission, The Passion" Husband, Father, Attorney, CPA, Steward Leader, Entrepreneur, MBA, Author, Builder, HBS OPM 25 Class, Mentor, Teacher

What Triggers You?

understanding yourself

You’ve lived with yourself for a good number of years but how well do you know yourself? Understand yourself? Do you REALLY know your motivations both short term and long term, surface and underlying? Have you taken the time to stand aside and observe from the side, dispassionately, that person that is you? Do you take notes (i.e. Journal)? Write out a plan, put in into effect, monitor the results, and correct and continue?

Or do you just prefer to wing it? Make it up as you go along, do it on the fly? After all, it’s not THAT important? Just your one and only life! Most folks plan their vacations with more effort than they plan their lives! Are you content to be “most folks”? Or do you want to create a personal masterpiece? Live the Life ExtraOrdinary?

Your life, your choices. Learn your triggers, your automatic, often un-thought out reactions. Do they serve you?  Help you or hurt you? Learn to Live Smart, de-wire the destructive ones that sabotage your dreams or lead to dumb choices, create constructive coping mechanisms, visualize empowering alternatives, design desirable substitutes.

Closing Quotes:

“Often, little situations trigger enormous reactions. Be there, present for it. Your partner will find it easier to see it in you, and you will find it easier to see it in them.” – Eckhart Tolle

“Your genetics load the gun. Your lifestyle pulls the trigger.” – Mehmet Oz 

“Family relationships trigger childhood wounds, and those wounds often trump our rational thinking.” – Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

“If you don’t think your anxiety, depression, sadness and stress impact your physical health, think again. All of these emotions trigger chemical reactions in your body, which can lead to inflammation and a weakened immune system. Learn how to cope, sweet friend. There will always be dark days.” – Kris Carr

As always, I share what I most want/need to learn. – Nathan S. Collier

Juvat Impigros Deus

hard work beats talent

“Juvat Impigros Deus” is the motto on the coat of arms of the Ramsden family, who held the Manor of Huddersfield since the reign of Queen Elizabeth I (1599). There has been a settlement in the area for over 4,000 years and was the site of an Iron Age hill fort and the remains of a Roman fort are nearby.

“Juvat impigros deus” translates literally as speaking, “God helps the industrious” or “God defends the diligent” but is usually given as “God (or Fortune) helps those who help themselves.” The phrase represents a timeless truth that has been known and repeated since mankind began to write. As far back as 409 BC Sophocles wrote, “No good e’er comes of leisure purposeless; And heaven ne’er helps the men who will not act”.

The concept is not limited to western culture: “Allah will not change the conditions of a population until they change what is in themselves.” Qur’an 13:11 and “Trust in God But Tie Your Camel” is an Arab proverb attributed to the Islamic prophet Muhammad.

Closing Quotes:

“Winners embrace hard work.” – Lou Holtz

“There is no substitute for hard work.” – Thomas A. Edison

“Life grants nothing to us mortals without hard work.” – Horace

“Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did.” – Newt Gingrich

“There is no substitute for hard work, 23 or 24 hours a day. And there is no substitute for patience and acceptance.” – Cesar Chavez

“Like I said, repetition in practice and hard work.” – Jerry Rice

“I like to work hard and see the results of my hard work.” – Erin Heatherton

“I enjoy hard work; I love setting goals and achieving them.” – Jewel

“I learned the value of hard work by working hard.” – Margret Mead

As always, I share what I most want/need to learn. – Nathan S. Collier

 

Non-Perfectionism: Is it Right for You?

perfect

Perfectionism is like fire; helpful if contained and directed, dangerous if allowed to run amuck. Wikipedia defines perfectionism as a personality trait characterized by 1) striving for flawlessness and setting high performance standards 2) accompanied by critical self-evaluations and concerns regarding others’ evaluations. The 1st set of characteristics are thought to be adaptive, the 2nd set potentially maladaptive.

Striving for Flawlessness; Setting High Performance Standards

High performance standards in areas of critical importance is vital; you want your pacemaker to work, right? Your parachute to open, your airbag to deploy. However, I’m not going to spend 30 minutes every morning making my bed to Martha Stewart standards or setting my dinner table to please her perfectionist eye either for that matter. Why? Those are not my priorities, not my goals; there are higher and better uses of my time and energy.

Critical Self-Evaluations; Concerns re Others’ Evaluations

I resolved a LONG time ago to be my own best friend, to convert my inner critic into my #1 fan, cheerleader, and coach. Further, I decided it was the good regard of the “man in the mirror” that counted most, that I would not put my sense of self into the hands of others, that I valued “self” esteem far more than “others” esteem. Rudyard Kipling’s line from the poem “IF” said it well: “…all men count with you, but none too much.”

Closing Quotes:

“If everything is a priority, then nothing is a priority.” – Management Maxim

“The perfect is the enemy of the good.” – Voltaire, 1694-1778

“Unrelenting perfectionism can be the enemy of happiness. Embrace being perfectly imperfect. Learn from your mistakes, forgive yourself and keep moving forward.” – Roy Bennett

“The maxim ‘nothing avails but perfection’ may be spelled P A R A L Y S I S” – Winston Churchill, 1874-1965

As always, I share what I most want/need to learn. – Nathan S. Collier

 

A BLOG ON PERSONAL LEADERSHIP BY THE FOUNDER OF THE COLLIER COMPANIES
LARGEST PRIVATE PROVIDER OF STUDENT HOUSING